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Self-Doubt is something that affects so many people, and in the social media age, it’s more prevalent than ever. Over the weekend, the Minneapolis Bloggers Union met and had a very open and stimulating conversation on the topic of self-doubt. I had the privilege of moderating this discussion with Adrianna of Sincerely Ami and Vanessa of Nessa Bess. I learned a lot from the two panelists as well as from the other bloggers in the room. I want to share the tips from Saturday with all of you because there are so many gems! If you ever find yourself feeling down, comparing yourself to others, and just doubting yourself in general, these tips will help. These tips are specifically for bloggers (as that was the audience), but most of them can be applied to just about anyone.
10 Tips for Overcoming Self Doubt
It’s Not All About the Numbers
It can be really discouraging to look at your followers, viewers, clicks, etc. and see a lower number than you are hoping. Try not to focus on the numbers. It feels good when a lot of people engage with your work (after you have spent so much time on it!) But numbers aren’t everything. When I find myself getting down on the numbers, I remind myself why I started blogging. I started blogging because I wanted to create a community, share experiences and knowledge, and be creative – not to get followers.
Track Your Accomplishments
Even if your blog is not where you want it to be, there are still so many things to be proud of! Whenever I have a big blogging accomplishment (partnership with a brand I love, a post that I’m proud of, etc.) I write it down and celebrate it! One of the bloggers at the event recommended this journal called the 5 Minute Journal. She said it really helped!
Take Social Media Breaks
Taking a break from Instagram is something everyone should do now and then. I have taken a few ‘social media breaks’ and it’s been when I have family visiting or I’m on a trip with friends. When I get to spend special time with people I don’t see often, I like to spend real quality time. For me that means not on my phone. Keep in mind that breaks don’t have to be days or even a full day. On Friday night Tony and I had a movie night and watched ‘To All the Boys I Loved Before’ and it was so nice to just hang out and not worry about the ‘gram for a bit!
Stay Off Instagram At Night
First, let me say that I am the worst offender of this. The last thing I do before going to bed (often) is scroll through Instagram. If scrolling through Instagram makes you less confident or makes you doubt yourself, don’t let it be the last thing you do before bed. The bedroom should be a peaceful and calm place, and I think that your phone can disrupt that routine. I want to *try* to not even have my phone in my bedroom. Vanessa suggested buying an actual alarm clock so that you don’t need your phone in bed.
Turn off Post Notifications
Whenever I would upload a photo to Instagram, I would see the ‘like’ notifications on my phone and worry whether it was a lot of likes or not. Another blogger friend of mine suggested to turning those notifications off. Posting to Instagram was so much more relaxed after that. I can post what I want and then only see the activity when I want to see it.
Stay in your lane
It’s easy to get into the comparison game when looking at other blogs and Instagram. I may look at a feed and think how wow, I love her street style photos, or she has the best home décor, why can’t I do that?! Well I’ll tell you one reason, that is not my niche. My style is not street style, nor am I super passionate about home décor. Why should I be comparing myself to them? I’ve got my own thing going on, and my own lane to stay in. Keep your eyes forward and keep going!
Tricks That Make You Feel Confident
Everyone has got their ‘tricks’ of what makes them feel confident. When I need a little confidence boost, I love to throw on a blazer. Blazers make me feel super polished, put together, and professional. I throw on a nice jacket and I can conquer the world. Maybe you have a shade of lipstick, or a pair of shoes. Find that little thing that makes you feel confident and keep that in your back pocket for the next time you need a confidence boost.
Say Positive Affirmations
Many of the bloggers at Saturday’s event agreed that positive affirmations helped them to feel more confident. The best time for affirmations is probably first thing in the morning when you are getting ready. “I am amazing!” “I can do anything I want to do!” Find what works for you. I also like to give myself a pep talk like this when I have something big happening at work! Try this before a meeting or interview!
Follow Blogs That Inspire You
There are way too many blogs and Instagram accounts out there that make you feel bad about yourself. Don’t follow them! I also learned on Saturday there is a way to ‘mute’ people on Instagram that you don’t want to unfollow, but that you also don’t want to see. There are also so many great influencers out there to follow that can inspire you! My personal favorite right now is Jenna Kutcher. If you don’t follow her yet, go give her a follow!
Find Your People
Sometimes you need to just talk it out. The best part about the Minneapolis Bloggers Union is that I have this community to talk, vent, etc. These bloggers understand what I’m going through in a way that my family and friends would not. I encourage you to join us (if you’re local!) and if you’re not, find that community that can support you.
*Thank you to Spaces in the North Loop for sponsoring this event!